Brenna

A few days ago, a friend of mine told me about a song that I would relate to. He probably didn't even realize how timely that was. 18 years ago today, at the age of 14, my daughter (Brenna) passed away due to complications from a brain stem tumor.

"She's With Me" by Collin Raye is a powerful song that captures a father’s deep love and pride for his daughter, who has special needs. The father, despite the challenges they face together, proudly declares, "She’s with me." When they go out, he introduces her to others, wearing his role as her caregiver like a badge of honor, even in moments when people look on with pity or sympathy. To him, she is a blessing, bringing him immense joy and purpose. Although she cannot communicate in typical ways, he cherishes every moment he sees her smile or hears her call.

This phrase, "She’s with me," symbolizes his pride and commitment as he navigates life alongside her. He feels privileged to be the one chosen to care for her, humbled by her purity and the glimpse of heaven he sees in her face. The father finds meaning in the difficult road they walk together, and he trusts that there is divine purpose in it.

In a moving conclusion, the father imagines standing before God at the end of his life. In this vision, he stands with his head bowed, feeling his own flaws and unworthiness. But then, his daughter steps forward, and with a loving, precious voice, she tells God, "He’s with me." The song comes full circle, emphasizing the power of their bond and the transformative love they shared. It highlights how the father’s devotion was noticed by his daughter, and in her own way, she proudly claims him, just as he did for her.

Our story somewhat resonates with Collin Raye's "She's With Me." Although our daughter was not "special needs", she had physical needs due to a brain stem tumor. Just as the father in the song says, “She’s with me,” we proudly supported Brenna throughout her life, recognizing her presence as a series of miracles, even amid the challenges. That phrase, “She’s with me,” captures the pride, love, and devotion we feel as her parents.

At the end of the song, it’s the daughter who speaks on behalf of her father, saying, "He’s with me." That vision mirrors our belief in the greatest miracle of all—that one day, because of Christ’s Atonement and Resurrection, we will be reunited with Brenna as part of an eternal family.

Through all the moments—each trial, each miracle, and the profound peace that fills us with hope—we feel the same faith that sustains us until that promised day arrives, when we will see our sweet Brenna again and feel the full joy of that reunion.

And I like to think that when I finally stand before the Lord, feeling all too aware of my own faults and shortcomings, Brenna will be there at my side. She’ll be ready to speak up, saying, “Don’t worry about him, Lord—he’s with me.”

Listen to She's With Me by Collin Raye